The Horrors of Ghosting

Boo!

Didn’t mean to scare you, but if we’re querying literary agents and pitching editors, the bone chilling truth is that, somewhere along the way, there’s a good chance we’ll be ghosted. It’s one of the most disheartening aspects of the publishing business.

We’re not talking about having an initial inquiry ignored, although that is a frustrating and rude reality. We must wonder, if agents are too busy to reply to emails with even a pat, form response, why do they remain open to queries from authors in the first place? And where do all those unanswered queries go to die?

For this discussion, we consider ghosting being consistently ignored and ultimately ditched by someone who has already engaged with us and, in fact, led us on like a bad romantic partner. They’ve accepted our story for publication. They’ve asked to read a full (or even a partial) manuscript. Sad to say, some authors are ghosted even AFTER THEY’VE SIGNED A CONTRACT.

As an aside… In 2023, a notable literary agency dumped one of its own agents without warning and dismissed numerous clients of hers with an en masse Friday night email. You can read about that here. Sadly, the industry is not immune to careless communication and hurtful behavior. That makes it all the more noteworthy when we receive polite and timely responses, even if they are rejections. For that, we are grateful. Remember what Brené Brown says: Clarity is kindness.  

It’s especially heinous when an agent offers representation and enters into a contractual promise to represent our work to publishers, and then – poof! – vanishes during the submission or revision process.

One of our contributors was thrilled to sign with her agent, who’d represented a number of award-winning and bestselling authors. Initially, he was enthusiastic and energized, even attracting interest from a Big 5 publisher. At some point in the submission process, the agent turned his client and her memoir over to an assistant without notice and rebuffed the author’s efforts to communicate. Completely misunderstanding (as if she’d never read it!) the client’s story – escaping a cult and healing through comedy – the assistant pitched the project to religious publishers which, needless to say, was a nonstarter. The author regrouped, and ultimately an indie publisher championed her work, producing an award-winning book.

Another Rejections Anonymous follower describes being ghosted by her literary agent before the book went out on submission.

There were red flags. My bad for ignoring them. She was so enthusiastic about my memoir when she signed me. Then she went quiet for two months. Later, when she profusely apologized and confided she’d been hospitalized for a mental health crisis, I had empathy for my agent and decided to stick with her. She reviewed my book proposal and gave me notes for revising it before submitting to editors. When I sent the revisions, she said she had a couple of manuscripts ahead of me and would get back to me in a few weeks. Totally fair. Weeks turned into months and she ignored my check-ins. After three months of being blown off, I confronted her. She blamed ME, claiming she didn’t think I’d actually do the work because she hadn’t heard from me since we discussed her notes on the proposal the previous fall. A flat out lie. I had checked in three times to let her know how it was going, then multiple times after delivering the proposal. Once again, she said she’d “get to it soon” and, although I initially agreed, that night I had second thoughts, emailed her and told her “never mind.” We parted ways ten months after she signed me. I feel like I wasted so much time! I know I deserved someone more responsive.

Soon after, the author learned her former agent had left the business.

We’ll look at more examples of ghosting next time. Please share your experiences with us. As always, we promise to keep it confidential!